Removing controlling statements from everyday interactions Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) is a distinct subset of autism. Beyond sensory sensitivities, one hallmark is a volcanic response to the use of controlling or narcissistic language. The words 'you' and 'your' are particularly problematic since they are accusative and emphasise the individual / possessive. Worse still are phrases such as 'you need to/you have to/you should/you must'. Everyday English is absolutely littered with such phrases, especially in more recent times due to the abolition of 'one' (which sounded pretentious and archaic, yet allowed for more objective communication) and also the introduction of controlling language from reality TV 'you need to/you absolutely have to' and social media '10 places you absolutely must visit before you die' etc. This tool will hopefully become a simple reference to allow people to interact without creating anxiety for PDAers. And, it will even help reduce stress in conventional interactions. Arguably this could become a default method of interaction and would go a long way towards solving issues of online abuse.